no rights reserved
(who really has rights, anyway?)
Q: Who is this person -- mr.tribe?
A: Michelle R. Tribe
Q: Who's she?
A: That person over there
Q: That's not an answer.
A: And that ain't no question.
Q: Fuck you.
A: Fuck you!
Q: Whatever. What is this newsgroup about?
A: This newsgroup is about five pounds. Or, to put it another way, it is hiding in your sock drawer. If you still don't understand, you need a haircut.
Q: Who posts here?
A: Only the certifiably insane. To become a registered poster, you must send a certificate attesting to your degree of mental illness, plus the signatures of four of your doctors, to:
372 Broadway Avenue
Q: Wait a minute! There's no 372 Broadway Avenue in Woodstock! I checked for the postal code in the "Canadian Field Researcher's Guide to Elusive Postal Codes".
A: Ok, you caught me.
Q: What do the people here talk about?
A: The people here don't talk.
Q: Grr. What do they post about, then?
A: Verbal vomit. Brain blockages. Incoherent babblings. What they found between their toes. Most of it is illegal, blatant plagarism from the so called "Bible" from the planet z!!!RRr#2.
Q: Am I allowed to post anything about Radiohead?
A: Only if it's a positive post. Michelle does not tolerate Radiohead-bashing.
Q: Oh. She's a big fan?
A: Regardless of what some people in Bells Corners may say, Michelle just likes the music. She has absolutely NO desire to lick Colin Greenwood's elbow.
Q: Does Michelle know the meaning of life?
A: The answer to life is not 42. Michelle has discovered, through a series of highly secretive yet scientific tests, that life is just a big game. The purpose of life is to have the most fun with what role you have been given. If you manage to win the game, you get to become a god. (So far, nobody has of yet won.)
Q: Uh huh.
A: Yeah, baby.
Q: What's Michelle's favorite colour?
Q: What would Michelle like to see people post?
A: Michelle would be happy if people posted. Anything goes -- post-modern, surreal, Jungian or anthropological subjects; detailed descriptions of a 30 second interval of your life; mocking those who are under-educated, middle-class (or higher!), white, anorexic, polluting, capitalistic consumerist pigs.
Q: Jeez. Are there many happy people here?
A: I'm tired of answering questions. Go away.
A: I said fuckin' go away! Sheesh!